it was almost as awkward as hearing my parents on friday nights in 2 in the morning starting, and than hearing at 2:01 my dad getting up and my mom going "i should have married a man"
I hate myself for saying your mom and I have the same friday nights.
don't worry... so do I
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
Ended the weekend putting away 30 nuggets. Training for 100.
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
We started pregaming at 8. It's 11, and her only 11:11 wish is to be sober. It's hard to not love her.
so apparently last weekend we taught the mascot how to shotgun beers. am i winning college yet?
It was a great party. People were literally still doing shots and playing drunk Jenga at 6am...
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
I can't imagine a friend I would rather lose my virginity to in a threesome.
Stop letting me drink alone on saturdays. My last 2 google searches were "short legs" and "caterpillar eyebrows" ? I don't even know.
Randomize
