youre lurking in front of me
Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Jon thought he was that blonde chick from Three's Company when he was shrooming
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
I can't bring an entire liter in the bar in my purse. I mean I can. I might. I'm probably gonna.
While he was gone for spring break I took his head board... I don't wanna wake up from his shenanigans for the rest of my college career.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Imma do four shots of whisky within two minutes and pass out. Otherwise this'll go badly.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
Randomize