Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
They're doing shots to celebrate every 15 minutes passing. You can come get them.
Did I actually say goodbye last night or did I just poison you with vodka and disappear?
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
did you just take a shot to penises and friendship?
i liked you for your lack of ambition and abundance of weed
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
