no, no I am DEF NOT pregnant. typo. sorry, wanted to talk about us...
i jus seen this fat chick walk buy look like she had don king coming out her arm pits..
The lack of respect you have for your penis baffles me. I'd rather rub my ball sack on public toilet seats than stick my dick in some of those girls.
A simple 'no' would have sufficed
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
He was singing "i gotta feeling" under his breath as i was pulling my top off.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
underwater hpnotiq shots? sure why not.
Totally uneven. One tiny pussy lip that almost didn't exist and one giant lip that unfurled liked 5 different times half way down her leg and could have been used to hoist the mainsail on a pirate ship.
k. The important thing is we are going out. You are stones. I am mildly hallucenating.
I just conveyed my whole sex life to my mom over voicemail. Anddd, I'm hammered.
Top night. Top night.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
He rubbed aloe on my sunburn while I blew him... could he be anymore perfect?
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
We need to stop smoking. I just ran into a glass door.
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