great, thanks for announcing that I gave you head over twitter
at least I said it was good
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
I didnt realize my nipple ring fell out until he coughed it up.
He's like my sex unicorn. Elusive and majestic. I'll catch him, I'm baiting with patron.
He met a random girl on the bus home and decided to go to Spain with her. The blackout decisions are becoming internationally epic. He has work in the morning.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
To the person who put the glitter on my ceiling fan...fuck you
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
Your vagina is awesome, like it needs to teach a class for other vaginas
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
Southwest doesn't have zingzang bloody Mary mix. I'm gonna file a complaint with the FAA
Randomize
