your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
i'm almost done photoshopping my face on his wife. it's a done deal
Bad news is he broke up with me via text message
But the good news is I've returned as mayor of whoreville
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
at last call she tried to get the bartender to fill her flask. when he refused, i had to stop her from trying to pour the rest of her beer in there.
She devotes each year to either men or women. I waited all year for her to be straight, tonights the night.
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Be proud. All I did last night was roll around in my nun costume selling drugs. I love Halloween.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
He wants me to tell you "my boner misses you"
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
i really love you but i feel kinda dumb about it
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