Ambien. No doubt about it.
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
all I remember is repeatedly winking at the fire marshall while he was counting the people in the bar
Theres a guy in your room wearing a franzi box costume and some girl is in the box giving him head.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
He told me to be careful with the shrooms because he mostly had caps left. He sounded apologetic but that's the best news all week.
The cleaning lady has moved my vibrator twice now so I would say I'm pretty ready to move out.
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
By god, his vagina is better looking than mine.
Okay first of all, that is a sick ass nickname please call me that forever. Second, i need your help.
It's so Britney 2007, you know?
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
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