i jhust puked up my retainher.
Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
Why did every guy I have ever slept with have to come into the library today?
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
We made out for three hours. Then she said she didn't sleep with redheads and left the party. So yes, I'm still drinking.
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
Are we really going to sext in Pokemon battle fashion?
I dreampt that we were shooting zombies while we having sex. Is that normal?
Hey I'm sorry for head butting you last night. Personally I thought it was funny at the time, but I can see how from your perspective it may not have been as enjoyable for you... Hope your lip is okay.
Nooo. I was entirely happy pretending that my vagina only existed for peeing and releasing Satan's waterfall.
We're gonna have to check the security cameras after last night
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
So...a chick sucked my crank...now her dog is licking my feet. I feel like a pharoh on vacation.
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