matts gf stood and watched my naked ass gather my clothes off his floor this morning. sweet.
one word: firstdatebathroomanal
Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
Think they will judge us if our pre drink is a kiddie pool of jello shots?
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Wondering when "babysitting" formed into "sleeping on the couch for five hours nursing a hangover and giving the kids Nyquil."
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Randomize
