he looked about as manly as a guy in a volkswagen bug can look
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
he kept saying "mind over matter" as he fucked me
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
He's just a really nice guy who stuck his tongue in the wrong place.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
you're the one asking for my vibrator at 4 in the morning so reconsider your life
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
im tired of guys just wanting to hook up with me. im like, guys, i know im pretty and i have a slammin bod and i love making out, but cant someone treat me with respect??
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