No better way to find a friend than to offer cyber sex and see what happens
me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
My mom asked me if I was being satisfied, sexually. And then discussed positioning.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
dude your girlfriend is running naked down the hall with a raw chicken taped to her stomach saying this is what I'll look like pregnant...run far far away
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
As hard as i've been partying lately their gonna have to revoke my organ donor status
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
As if right now I am a humanitarian. Full story to come in the morning. It involves sex.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Last night I tried to apply for a job at ihop. That drunk.
For some reason drunk me always leaves sober me a banana in the morning.
Totes just ripped ass and the bartender's eyes got wet
Randomize
