My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
THERE IS PRACTICALLY A BEER FUCKING WATERFALL
Hey I think I found part of your tooth next to your wine bottle in the floor board of my car.
in a garage, wearing a toga, theyre debating the logistics of Coke Pong. If I don't make it out of here... it was me who stole your Barbie in the 4th grade- I've never forgiven myself.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
well the blowjob for study guide exchange was a success.
She was trying to drink out of the beer bong and she thought it didn't work. Little did she know there was no beer in there. Then she got mad at us. Girls.
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
I still don't understand if he's using me to write his resume or if we're dating
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I'd say I was is in rare form last night but it's becoming pretty common.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
Randomize
