i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
Three Architectural classes: $990.00 Architectural supplies: $300.00 Changing majors and using my architectural supplies to roll blunts: Priceless
He stopped responding after the animal pictures... I do this EVERY TIME.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
"Little drunk?" Honey you were "livetweeting" Sublime's "Sublime" album while it was playing in his car, and at one point you said you hoped they play Santeria. "Little drunk" doesn't cover it.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
I didn't mean that as an expression. I'm literally asking if you want to watch Netflix and do nothing.
Randomize
