Well my night just got interesting. I just home from the police station. Hope you had a fun night out!
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
Just woke up to the best idea ever. Vodka infused BUTTER. Take a second, and think of the possibilities.
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
So lets not base feelings on vagina tingles
We were having margaritas and I was saying "back when I was drinking..." They looked all confused. Then I realized "holy shit they think THIS is drinking?"
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
We lost. I'mma go home and drink more and do a face mask and wonder why it is that god put me on this Earth to suffer
you know my pussy doesn't know between good and evil
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
Randomize
