Crown is evil. It plays hide and seek with my morals
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
Thank you blackberry messenger, for giving me a way to sext faster and more efficiently
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
The closest thing to a sext that you will ever receive from me is a picture of pepperonis on Greg's asscheeks, clenching.
He stumbled out of the bar bathroom at 3:30 am with his jeans unzipped and his dick hanging out - it was the physical manifestation of "blackout with your cock out"
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Kings cup with teenagers tonight
Done deal
I have so many feelings about this burrito
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
I just don't think it's that outlandish to ask that I don't get messages from my husband at 8:30pm on a Wednesday telling me he peed on our cat
i am also 80% sure that my shirt glows in the dark.
Randomize
