AIM automatically accepts video chats on my laptop. I found this out when I got a text from Jacob after my first attempt at drunk lesbian sex saying, "I'd give it a 7. You need to work on your positioning." I think I'm single now.
that's like riding a pigeon when you could fuck a bald eagle
and unfortunately for you, hallmark doesnt make a "sorry i was getting a blowie in the backseat of your car while you were driving, projectiled my jizz onto your hand, and caused you to crash" card
Your kinda stuck between a rock and his hard dick on this one..
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
booty call hours are between 1:30-3:00 AM thurs-sat with the exception of major drinking holidays and election days. please try again
Do you want the something i can tell my mom in ten year version or the you're gonna call me a whore but be proud version?
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
I'm so hungover. I just keep eating the otter pops I'm trying to use to get rid of my hickies.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
It's getting harder and harder to find People to carry her home
She shouldn't drink
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
You came in, yelled 'i am from the future' then puked all over the floor
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
Randomize
