I really like him. That's why I'm having sex with someone else, so he doesnt think i'm a slut.
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
you act like breakfast cereal isnt an entirely appropriate chaser
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I fed him pizza in bed. I'm probably the best one night stand ever.
That boy has a whole ocean of crazy lying just beneath the surface waiting to rise up, he's like the tar sands of crazy
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
Just walked by the neighbors and they are definitely butt naked sitting on a bed, watching Netflix, baked out of their minds, with the blinds open.
Welcome to Bellingham.
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
I just got dumped by my fuck buddy. Now I have to have sex with my husband.
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
Randomize
