You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
i'm stoned. there's a jazz trio playing outside across the street...scared that mike myers will appear & start yelling 'woman...WHOA MAN. WHOOOA MAN.' i'm snapping my fingers.
My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
there's chicken and sequins in our bathroom sink. part of me almost wants to know what happened
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
If after tonight I can still walk on my own, take me to another bar.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
I mean I only got hit in the ass with ONE firework
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
