I am at a 420 party and i just told a girl "hey, less not getting donuts, more getting donuts"(1-855): and did she get any doughnuts?
No. I am devastated
I'm pretty sure I left my reasoning skills at home last night, and just brought anger and rage with me.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Just pulled over to throw up in a day care parking lot while the kids were outside playing. The adults were mortified.
Was that not clear on Friday when I nearly deapthroated two ice cubes?
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
K, so let's go ahead and say that mcnugget and margarita Tuesday was a bad idea
Dude she let me install handle bars on her headboard. I should have nailed my boss years ago.
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
I'm told I threw my cigarettes at the TV one by one Shouting about the cast of Community.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
She's not answering my calls
Well it sounds like you really fucked up
WHO HOLDS A GRUDGE OVER MEMES
You kept running around yelling "I need my pajamas" & then you got naked. Shit just went downhill from there.
Randomize
