I don't remember. Are we still dating?
Hey Operation Dumbo Drop... FYI, when you select your date this evening, our doorway is 3'x7'
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I'd like to personally thank you for not letting anyone puke in any of the salad bowls this time
Haha pretty bummed I didn't stay night yesterday after the bj fest you described
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
But I do know they give away thousands and thousands in booze
My liver has a boner
Dave called me blind fucking drunk thinking he was going to die from drinking with drake bell(wtf?) saying "it's all that drake motherfucker's fault" and later proceeded to tell me "you are my twitter"
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
My dad's girlfriend is driving through the snow to bring me my purple haze. If he doesn't wife her up, we have a bigger issue on our hands.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
