you want me
i'd rather choke on a dick.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
Then my mouth guard fell out of the hole, so that's how the dog poop got in my mouth.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
I've never seen so many strippers at a funeral...
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
He was like low grade Riff Raff, but I hit it. Twice. His grill popped out the second time.
It might look like I curled my hair last night but it's just the jiz.
Sorry I called bc I needed help peeing outside
But I did it
he's smothering me... and not in the good, can you move your thigh off my face please?.. way
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
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