I'm gunna smoke cigs today. I feel like I'm in that powerful and gritty mood which requires them
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
she stopped mid-blowjob to explain how to acheive the haircut shown in the movie
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
Haha yeah this costume is worse than I imagined. I look more like a gothic hooker who caters specifically to creepy men with doll fetishes
i thought you were just a really comfy body pillow until i sobered up. oops.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
I'm so high right now that I'm wearing gloves.
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
Randomize