Look at my ENTIRE past
Highly public sexual behavior gross mismanagement of funds socially unaccpetable and radical speech and thought
Might as well have a blog about it at this point
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I havent dry-humped that much since freshmen year. Forgot how good it doesnt feel.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
He doesn't need a wingman, he needs a miracle
It will be a surprise...all i can say is stripper clown
We lost track of him for only 10 min and he gets kicked out for sneaking into the kitchen and trying to operate the deep fryer.
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Siri just called me GayBoy in front of my family. I will destroy you.
Seriously, don't even. "Hi, have I seen you half naked covered in bright red body paint on the internet?" is NOT acceptable water-cooler chit-chat.
Aw.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
How early is too early for a booty call on a Monday night?
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
Randomize
