he just said he'd buy the porn
its a step up from the last guy
We saw some woman wearing leather pants. It was weird. We have decided to follow her on her travels to see where people go in leather pants in Michigan.
threw up in a bar last night and got laid on an air mattress. my bucket list just got a lot shorter
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
the trail of clothing leading from the bed to the door was in the exact order i needed to put them on. underwear near the bed shoes by the door.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
sooo what's the appropriate music to listen to after you find out the dude you been fucking, is legit married with kids...what genre is that?
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Then, she put flavored warming oil on my dick and was amazed when something she bought FROM SPENCER'S almost burned my dick off.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud
the guy in front of me in walmart is buying a blowtorch, potato chips, and condoms. I'm curious and horrified at the same time.
Randomize
