Screwed.edu
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
Shark Week. Kick off begins Sunday. The drinking game has been upgraded to include jumping/breaching sharks and Jake's not allowed to bring the harpoon. Period.
Get everyone out of their dorms and watch 3 girls do the walk of shame from my room.
I'm too hungover to crawl to the fridge so im eating the candy nipple tassels I got bought for Christmas
81 degrees in april.... Thinking margaritacicles, you in?
I swear 95% of pictures on my phone are from drunken nights I don't remember with me doing a peace sign alone in somebody's bedroom.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
I think it was clear she was setting us up when she brought me over to you and said "Present!"
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
Underoos and an IDGAF attitude: all you need to successfully win at life
(Underoos optional)
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
Unfortunately i'm awake, hungover, and covered in something I'm pretty sure is Easy Cheese. Send help.
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
Randomize
