it doesn't count as moral degradation if you win the strip off -right?
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
You said you couldnt get the condom on but "its the thought that counts"
Woke up with my foot jammed into a VCR
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
I walked into the kitchen and twelve of them were just staring at the oven. Freshmen are the weirdest drunks ever.
Malt liquor mondays...better in theory.
Apparently I pulled that girl's number while I was trying to insist my drivers license had enough money on it to cover the tab.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
I'm gonna go parent style on your ass... I don't ask much from you but if you could please just come get shitfaced with me I would really appreciate it
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Two words: nipple clamps
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