In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
officially spring now- first drug bust of the season across the street.
I will now refer to my life as before and after I used Astroglide for the first time
Hey fuck you and your taint. I'm just riding a canoe called life, back the fuck off. P.s. I need a ride
Tomorrow morning i will black in to find a christmas tree in my room that i dont remember how i got. I love college
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
See! Theres potential!
Oh yeah. All good relationships start with a threesome.
Pretty sure i brought my phone charger to a booty call
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
My life is pants optional.
I was giving him head and he slipped one of those hats with propellors on top on my head.
Randomize