I only kidnapped one of them. chill
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
Picking up third year law school girls is like MILF hunting for beginners
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
Whoa. I woke up to 10 new text messages. All about bacon.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
All my interactions with my brother are drug deals at this point
Sex with him is like pizza, it can be shitty but its stillll pizza.....
Can I just skip the lesson I have planned for tomorrow and just teach my students about Prohibition using my impending hangover?
This is why american education is failing
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
