took him home. told him i would rock his world. passed out. a for effort f for follow thru
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
Just remembered getting lost in a "shortcut" through yards and GPSing my way home last night
I think they were cool with it, they should have know if I was the host of the baby shower it was going to involve a keg and jager shots.
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
Dude. I have so much pot that i only worry about running out of lighters
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
Apparently my face was in the trashcan and in between throw ups I was screaming LOS DIABLOS. I woke up this morning with a bird flying around my room. Nobody seems as concerned as I am.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
So random question. Does beer act the same as other alcohol disinfectants?
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
i found you passed out on the floor with a half-eaten pie. i figured youd be the last person to care if i went and banged your sister
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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