How bad was it?
You ran around telling everyone that you were going to click them to death on google earth
shes got a 6th sense for me cheating...the the hailey joel osmound of me getting bjs
I don't care if he acts like a don't exist 6 days a week. On the 7th day he makes makes my vagina cry. In a good way. Jesus understands.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Breakfast-of-shame with my mother. I was in half of a sexy Mad Hatter costume. We had artisan bagels and judgement.
I cant tell which is worse. That its only my third time doing laundry this year or that its the first time ive done it sober.
my boobs are worth more now than the blue book value of my car.
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
Perhaps if I didn't mortify my parents last night with my drunken obnoxious behavior which resulted in the casualty of an entire decorative bathroom shelf which I completely ripped off the wall and left for dead, I would be more than willing to go day drinking.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
How's work going?
Boring. I have a cat on a leash right now
Randomize
