Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
dude. she was texting with her nipple. I love touch screen phones!
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
And then I learned that we are dating when I said it's out of line to bring fuck buddies home to meet the parents. And then I was single.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
I know he is still a student. I am not asking if his being an underwear model makes it more ethical, just less prosocutable.
You know I think I am ok with him not moving in yet. He came over, fixed my closet, ate me out, and left. I'm now in sweats drinking coke and rum and watching new girl. This works for me.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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