i'm officially boycotting relationships. hello random hook ups and treating men like meat.
The cop only confirmed I'm .22% Irish. Then I threw up on him.
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
Currently smoking a blunt with my one night stand's mom. I don't know how I should feel about this.
We can't be fuck buddies. You stare into my eyes while we fuck.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
I AM A HOUSE CAT. I CANNOT DO THIS LION BUSINESS WE CALL THE SINGLE LIFE
You meet the best people naked in a hot tub at 2 am.
He literally took a shit in my bathroom and then broke up with me.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
Randomize