u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
This is your Morning Wood Report: I have it.
Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
headbutted the bartender, tried to bite the bouncer, and pissed on a cops shoes. and i still got laid. god, it's good to be home
I just saw at least a dozen senior citizens on roller blades. way to drunk for this.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
I think the main reason you were throwing up so much was the quart of soap you chugged trying to burp bubbles. you came close
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I also found a beer label in my bra and I'm pretty sure you put it there and said "this means I trust you"
In other news I think my vagina is sunburnt
I had a sex dream about Fox Mulder, and the Royals just won the World Series. My life is complete.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Randomize
