Uggggg i want to leave and get bombed over baghdad
K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
I have discovered my latent superpower. If a friend is dating a bi chick they will inevitably try and talk me into a threesome.
You're the only person not starstruck by him
Yes. That tends to happen after you regularly lick someone's balls.
I gave him a bj as a thank you for helping. I think that's good.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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