apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
we cant have a funnel and a dog. thats a lot of responsibility
He said he loved me so I pretended not to hear it because I don't think "I love your penis" was the response he was looking for.
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
Just got my stitches out.. Now I can give a proper hand job
I really care about you, but im still gonna have to make you pay for dinner from the pain and suffering in my knees and vagina.
Things I Learned Tonight: I have no future in goat wrangling. Herding. Whatever you call the ridiculosity that just transpired.
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
I'm gonna die. First I'm gonna throw up. But then I'm gonna die.
I'm going to reward myself for having sex with coffee and a breakfast burrito.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
Thanks for fucking the skin off my dick
It was a joint effort between my vagina my feet and your hand you can't just blame that all on me
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Randomize
