I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
dude, i have to cancel tonight, my neighbor just bought a goat
what if his mom answers? its like high school, but hes 30
I tried carrying you from the bathroom to your bed and you begged me to bring the toilet too
WHY IN THE FUCK DID YOU LET ME DRUNK PUNCH STEVE? HE IS SUCH A NICE GUY!
I will keep you posted and someday if we daydrink teach you how to do a footjob
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Just kidding. Don't worry, you're getting sugar and orgasms for Valentine's day.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Rain drop, shock top, drinking can't stop stop
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Randomize
