he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Getting pregnant off pre-cum is like getting high off erasers
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
"Let's chug a beer then make out" doesn't sound as nice, but it would prob make him cum right there.
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
I couldn't sleep so I took 4 shots of vodka and promptly threw up in the sink. Happy Thursday
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
He fell into the beer pong table and broke it. Then he threatened to throw the toliet at us if we didn't let him keep playing
The only good thing about the sex was that he finally cracked the spot on my back that's been hurting.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
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