it sounds like her vocal chords are covered in pudding and rocks. come get me.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
The liquor store guy just accused me of buying alcohol of minors due to how many bottles I got. The guy should be used to this from me.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Her delivery came. She's ordered a pack of 144 condoms.
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
So are we just not going to talk about the time I came home to you jerking it in the kitchen?
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Randomize
