thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
I just found out why they dont make table-dance tables out of glass.
that knocking you heard last night......that was her head slowly going through the wall
I think call of duty has replaced my masturbating. And I'm alright with that.
I'm pretty sure this all started when I found a vibrator in my mom's sock drawer and had my first orgasm when I was ten...
I hope his life after cheating on me is as good as Tiger's golf game is these days.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Does Jim keep sending you pics of him in drag too???? If so, are you also slightly uncomfortable?
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Why did I wake up with a skeleton in my bed? Is it from the lab?
Oh crap, that's where it ended up. Yeah, don't ask.
Randomize
