so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
Chipotle chips and wine for breakfast. Its def game day
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
I just don't remember. It's like I went to bed on July 3rd.. and woke up on the 5th. Nothing.
Um ... did I have a lizard on my shoulder last night at the bar?
There's a girl in class eating a pumpkin pie. Like a whole pie straight from the pan with a fork.
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
What the hell was that?
Genius. It was sheer genius.
Randomize
