I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
...then she kept trying to make balloon animals with my flacid penis. I'm never drinking whisky with you again.
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
It was fun, but I mean, any day that starts with shower tequila is bound to be good.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Sweet. Well pat yourself on the back this penis just burst back into the the game and the vaginas of millions
The ketchup exploded, and totally splooged his face and the wall. You could see the outline of his head in the wall splatter.
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
I'm starting to think that birthday sex is just an urban legend. Like the boogey man, and woman orgasms.
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
my liver is dry heaving
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
