Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
HELP! I am trapped in a douchebag ad... full of Affliction and Ed Hardy. Seriously? is he gonna leave his sunglasses on the entire 10 seconds of this encounter?
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
A guy with a mustache poured a beer down your throat while you had a crippled boy named Sunshine riding your back
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
Found a pic on my phone from last night. You're drunk. Arm wrestling some guy. In the bar bathroom. At a baby changing station. It's my new wallpaper.
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Just googled myself and a bunch of boob shots of me came up. Apparently my phone automatically uploaded them to my google plus.
Please google me ASAP and ensure I corrected this...
Curing hangovers with more alcohol was a great idea for the first five days
Sorry for trying to wake you up by slapping your ass with a fruit 2 go.
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
