She said her name was "party"
i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Where's the Hot Mess Express headed tonight?
I hope that's not the new nickname for my friends and me.
im using old socks as coasters. im going to make a great housewife.
I have come to the conclusion that if you don't fulfill your life ambitions you should go into porn
I'm glad we have the kind of friendship where if either of us is too drunk to fuck a hot guy, we pass the responsibility to each other and get the job done.
I just re read that. We really need to get our lives together.
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
A valentines day commercial would come on while I'm masturbating...
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
At one point we were both in the bathroom and i was taking a shit while holding your hair as you puked in the sink. Friendship.
A sultry night of tacos and sex sounds nice. Should I bring home milk?
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize
