every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
i'm eating jello out of a teacup with a fork. awesome?
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
The whole time we were fucking I kept thinking, "My dad would love this cologne. I'll have to ask him where he got it." the highlight of the night is that I figured out my dad's birthday gift.
Apparently I send drunk snapchats a lot and they always have random dudes in them. Like one night it was just me and some guy I don't know sitting on my couch.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Everclear isn't food dammit
One of the finest moments in my life was when I was puking in between my legs as I was shitting, and thought to myself "hmm this shall be called shomiting."
You threw up at the outdoor bar and it was pretty...astonishing just how much can come out of such a small human.
Randomize
