when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
i feel like barbie the morning after an elton john party
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
You fed me milk from the beer bong because you thought it would "Sober you up" .
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
If I can't get slightly excited by the thought of his face between my legs then I know I can never sleep with him.
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
I'm using my breathalyzer result sheet as a coaster for my 40.
My underwear said "hard to get" on the butt. He laughed when he took them off.
I'm having salsa con queso and a leftover half-drank/flat red bull for breakfast. Nothing you propose doing today would be a downgrade.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
