this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
i told my grandma i broke up with my boyfriend. her reply " you need to play the field more anyway"
Michael Jackson and Farah Fawcett are dead
NOOOOOOOO not MJ! Someone tell the paramedic to grab him by the heart and just "Beat it"
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
I can feel myself smiling like 10 minutes after I stop smiling, and that's just like... so awesome.
It's home.......I'm going to the store in disguise to get skittles and cake frosting. Then I'll eat the frosting in a dark corner while I cry and wonder what I did to deserve this.
I know shes my ex. And I know she punched me in the face and stole my car to go get drunk. But it's the best sex I've ever had.
You're sick. Take pictures if you can.
Someday, but I will be heavily drugged and there will be no dolphins.
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I woke up to see that I had ripped my boxers into a loin cloth because we were watching last of the mohicans
you start one little fire by the lake and the police want to talk to you all night...
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
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