At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
Medical school killed my enjoyment of porn. Hard to keep a boner when you're diagnosing all the actor's STDs and skin disorders.
i just keep taking vicodin and supergluing random shit
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
My nose hurts from that stripper beating me with her tits
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
just so you know they found you begging for money at the L station. What the fuck did you drink last night?
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Legit hope my Trump humping Brother dies of this shit so I can stop pretending to still love him.
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