"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
what if the hokey pokey really is what its all about?
You fell asleep mid BJ last night. I put your pants back on you. My ego is pretty bruised this morning.
the guy i hooked up with is asleep on our couch. please dont fuck him.
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
i'm sick of coming in second next to bourbon.
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
So apparently we wrote "Lube Shopping" in Paula's diary on every friday for the rest on the year....
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
If you're into enormous nipples, you should ask out my office's receptionist.
Nothing showshows the government the middle finger more than spending your tax refund on drugs
So I got cockblocked by our relationship status last night
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
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