i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
No, veal is cruel because they chain them down, I'm talking about free range human babys here.
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
i thought they made a 7-hour walmart run, but they were actually in jail.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
Drug-sniffing dog walked past me and my suitcase in the train station. My opinion: they need a new dog
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
body shots are frowned upon at family weddings. i'll keep that in mind next time. maybe.
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
If I knew the person sucking my dick didn't say thank you for their Christmas presents I wouldn't be able to cum.
Randomize