There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
so he reminded me it was our 9 month anniversary and then said "we could've had a baby by now"
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
The night was going well until I found tufts of my hair in the freezer. Then I got nervous
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
The airport has the best people watching and munches... It should be a destination drinking location
Unless you can blow me and bake me a pie at the same time, im not impressed.
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
You were drunkenly dancing with a statue you affectionately referred to as "The Captain." I wasn't going to deny your happiness.
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