considering you've had every STD known to man, you think if i sent you a picture of my dick (no homo) you could tell me whats growing on it?
is the fantasy fufillment of sex in a hot tub worth the possible infection?
there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
Just did a slip and slide down a five story staircase in my dorm. Being an engineer is fucking awesome
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I hate drunk me more than anyone else in this world
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
You don't have to buy me dinner, watch tv or even hang out if you don't want. Just fuck.
this strobe light makes my body turn on and off
Randomize
